See you

Last night we were walking to the car. It was already dark. I had Lily's hand but she was afraid. She said "I can't see you." I squeezed her hand and reminded her of my presence. Again she said "momma I can't see you....it wouldnt be scared if I could..." it just melted my heart.

A thousand times in the last week I have said the same thing to God. Lord I can't see you, I am afraid. He always reassures me and I reply as my daughter did. But if I could see you Lord...

Rest your heart today. He is there. He has your hand and He will not leave you. Rest in faith. Hebrews 11:1

Your plate

Last night we were eating dinner. Lily sat really close to me and asked for bites off of my plate. We had the same food, but something about moms plate makes it better. I know this to be true because to this day I can make a plate just like my moms and still want to trade her because hers is better!

As I was praying this morning I thought about how often I try to make my life "look" just like God would want it to. But when it's all said and done, unless my life is completely surrendered to His, it won't be as sweet. Looking the right way doesn't make it great. Today I will let Him be my life.

Spill

Good morning friends! Goodness, life is crazy isn't it. Whew.

Yesterday before we went to church, I spilled an entire cup of coffee. During Sunday school I did it again. Went to wal-mart, knocked about 10 bottles of lotion off the shelf. Really...can't make this up! As I was picking them up i thought, "I should have just stayed in bed this morning" God's reply to my thought ( yes he hears us even when we are not talking to Him) "if you had stayed in bed, you would have missed this moment with Me"

In this Christmas season when we are focused on all the stuff we have to get done....all the places we have to go....all the people we have to please...take time to hear Him. He is speaking to the child He loves, even when you are in the middle of the fourth mess you have made today...

Bethlehem

This morning on the way to work I was listening to Christmas music....yes I am one of "those" that already has her tree up!! One of my favorite songs is by Point of Grace. The song is about Mary and Joseph. Joseph tells Mary that even though the journey seems long and the goal unattainable, they are not that far from Bethlehem....

Today of your journey seems too hard, too long and too overwhelming....be encouraged. You are not that far from Bethlehem. Your hope will be realized soon....

Feet

Last night as I was cooking dinner, I heard the girls playing. I looked over and saw Lily washing Claire's feet. Then Claire said "my turn!" and she washed Lily's feet. Although they did not know, they were presenting the sweetest picture of God's love. I wondered how long it has been since i have taken the time to wash someone else's feet....it has been way too long

Lights

Last night the girls and I were driving home. Lily yelled "look mama!! Look at those city lights!" She was seeing the lights from Lawton. I love that she is fascinated with the city! *gets that from her mama*

God is really trying to make me understand that His life, His will are better than mine. Like lily being fascinated with a glimpse of the city lights....that is what we are living. On our very best days we see only a glimpse of what He has planned for us.  If you are in a place of doubt in your heart, I understand. Let's pray together and learn that the lights of His city shine in a way that can never be hidden if we allow ourselves to see them!

Wait

Last night we sat down to dinner and I had cookies baking in the oven. After Lil ate she asked for dessert. She wanted candy. John explained to her that if she would wait just a few minutes, the good dessert would be ready. She had a hard time with this and slumped in her chair while she waited most impatiently! When the cookies were done we all had one (or three)! She said "I love warm cookies!" Claire exclaimed "I waited!!" it was a sweet moment!

This morning as I prayed I thought about all the times I don't wait. I want the instant gratfication. Don't wait foe Gods perfet plan or will. I want what I want when I want it. If I do wait on His plan I do it slumped in my chair. If you are waiting on His direction, hold fast. It will be worth the wait...
"for I will do a work in your day which you would not believe even if it were told to you" Habakkuk 1:5

Scary part

Last night Lily was watching Beauty and the Beast while I was cooking dinner. There is one part that scares her so we always fast forward through that part. When it got to that part last night I had my hands full when i heard her ask me to skip that part so I said "lily Beth just look away from the movie..." her response " but momma you can make it go away!"

Do any of you feel that today? You know God can make it all go away and you wonder why He hasn't. Trust me His hands are not too fulll for you....keep trusting in Him. Trust Him too see you through the scary part....

Sit down

Yesterday I was doing laundry and cleaning house....getting ready for the busy week to come. Claire said "sit down momma" I attempted to explain the importance of getting ready for Monday...to a 22 month old! I continued cleaning. After another hour Claire was throwing a fit. I asked what was wrong. She said "sit with ME momma" I did and all was well.

We didn't play, we just sat together. That's all she asked for. And this morning that us all God is asking of me.....sit with Him won't you?

Hang in there

Today I was talking to a friend about life.  This friend made the comment, "hang in there." This statement frustrates me.  Mostly because my the time I am willing to tell someone I am not doing well, I don't have the strength to 'hang in there.'
 
I don't have any great story today....but as I thought about this my heart ached for all of you who are trying to 'hang in there'.  My encouragement today is to tell you to stop.  Stop trying.  It's not your job to hang in there.  God has you in the palm of His mighty hand and does not need you to be strong.  He has more than enough strength to hang on to you.  So let go and let your Father hang on to you....He will not let go. 

Foundation

Lily has been waking up every morning at 6. I know it is too early but I am treasuring our "make-up" time together. She is so inquisitive about each step. This morning she was particularly taken by the foundation. She wanted to know why we put it on first. I explained that it covers imperfections and also helps keep all of our other make up on for the entire day. She loved it, not as much as lip gloss of course!

On the way to work I was thinking about our sweet time together. The Lord prompted me with a question "have you laid your spiritual foundation this morning?" hmm. My life is founded solely and wholey on my Savior, but I do not remember that daily. I may take time to put foundation on my face, but forget to rake time to be thankful for His foundation in my life. His foundation not only hides imperfections, it make them disappear completely under the love and Salvation of His Son Jesus. How is your foundation this morning?

Hats

It is going to be a beautiful day!

Next to my front door, there are four hats hanging on the wall. These hats belonged to four men who were precious to my life. The other day, Claire took my dad's cowboy hat off the wall and put it on. She looked adorable! I looked at her and in a blink all I could focus on what whose hat she was wearing. I was overwhelmed by sweet memories and peace.

I wonder today, when I am doing My Fathers work, do I disappear? Can my motives and selfihness be taken over by whose work I am doing? Wouldn't it be sweet if all we wanted people to see was WHOSE hat we were wearing instead of how great we looked wearing it?

Snooze

Morning! This morning I hit the snooze button once or three times! I was just sleepy! When I did hop up I had to hurry around and run out the door....

How often do I do this with Gods calling on my life? I hear Him asking but I just keep hitting the snooze. Lord after I... And I really need to do ....first I will Lord just give me a few more minutes. How many times have we hit the snooze on Gods voice? Maybe we should stop, hop up and do what He has asked....

Just

Last night we were playing outside. On the way up the hill lily stopped and said "daddy I just need to let you carry me"

As I watched John hold my tiny girl I ached to be as needy for my Father as she is for hers. I love that she needed to "let" him carry her. If I would let go of my selfish pride, I could ask my Father to do the same, and He would.

Next

Yesterday we were busy at work. I was working at my chair and looked up and saw that there were four charts waiting. Ugh. I wanted to hurry and get my patient done so I could move on to the next. But it doesn't work that way. Each step to each patient has to happen in the right order. So I cleared my mind of the waiting patients and focused solely on the patiet in my chair.

As I worked I thought about how the next step works in my spiritual life. I always look ahead. I see the challenges lying before me and I want to jump into them before I work on the step I am on. But He shines the perfect  amount of light for the step I am on. He does not want me to jump ahead. I need to trust Him and wait on Him to take me through the journey in the right order....

Okay

Last night we were sitting at the table. John said, "Daddy has an idea for after supper" Claire said "okay" he started to tell his plan and Claire interrupted him and said "okay daddy!". She didn't need to know the plan. If she got to be with her daddy that was enough.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we said "okay Lord" before we even knew
What what the plan was. 

Second mile

Yesterday I went to the gym. I was on the treadmill...the first mile was tough ( I had taken a little vacation from running) but the second mile about whipped me. It was exhausting. As I fought through it, I began to think of all the second miles in my life right now. Maybe you are with me. Maybe you have been out of church for a while and the thought of going back seems too hard, maybe you are at church every time the doors are open but you haven't spent time with Jesus in far too long. Maybe you are sick....at first you had the strength that would shake the world but now, you are tired. You have hit your second mile. Hear me friend.....God is not only in your second mile....HE is in your every step. Don't take another one without Him, you are His.

Light

Hi friends - 

Around 3 o'clock this morning, we heard lily crying. Usually if she wakes up in the night she will just come get in bed with us. When john went to get her, he realized that we had not left the bathroom light on. So when she woke up, she was was in the dark.

I layed down with her and as she cuddled up to me I prayed over her heart and mine. I thought about how thankful I am that God never forgets to leave a light on for me. His light may only shine on my very next step, but it does shine. If you feel like you are in the dark this morning, take a breath and look more closely. He is shining His light exactly where You need it most. 

Heard

Morning sweet friends

Yesterday afternoon John and I were bringing in the groceries. He gets the heavy stuff, because he is manly and auper atrong and I get the not heavy stuff...works well!  I ask him to put the cases of coke and water on the bench in the entry way until the 4th. He kept bringing them into the kitchen. So I would move them. When he notice he asked why I was doing that. I told him why. Then he asked why I didn't tell him to do that! Oh goodness!! I explained that I had...he replied "if I had heard you, I could have saved a few steps" I really do adore him!

I got to thinkinv about how true that statement is in my life. If I would not only hear Gods voice, but listen to it, I would save myself a lot of strife. His plan may not always be shorter or easier but it is always more peace filled knowing you heard His call and followed it.

Knowing

Last night I was laying down with the girls. Claire fell asleep quickly...lily was not so quick. After a few minutes I felt her tiny hand on my face. She was tracing my eyes, lips, nose...I asked her what she was doing. She replied "knowing your face momma"

It was precious. She has no idea what an pact that made on my heart. In that moment I stopped and prayed. I prayed to want to know my Saviors face. I want to take time to sit with Him and know Him in a way that cannot be broken. How well do you know your Savior??

Today at lunch , the server asked if I wanted a box foru leftovers. I said no...I have issues with leftovers unless they are from home...odd.

As I drove back to work it occured to me how often John and the girls get my leftovers. I het home from work tired and give them what energy I have left, sometimes none at all. Even more so, I give God my leftovers all the time. My Savior gets less than anyone and usually what is left is tired , cranky and whiney.

Today, I will give my family more than my leftovers...and my King will get my entire heart....

Will you show me

Last night lily Beth was sitting on my bed. She wanted to watch a movie in my room. She got the remote and said , momma...will you show me?" she wanted to learn how to do it on her own. I lived that she not onlyasked me to show her, but she waited on me.

How peaceful my life would be if I asked my Father the same thing. "will you show me Lord" and if we wait ... He will do just that...

It's mine

So we are in the "it's mine" phase of life with Claire bear.  Everything  is hers. And if you don't know, wait about three seconds and she will tell you. Last night John told her that the digital camera was in fact, not hers...she was shocked and fell apart!  As I watched her throw her tiny fit I thought about how every single day I claim things that are not mine. Whether it be my money, my time, my family, my fibro....you name it, I claim it. When in all reality none of it belongs to me. If it is not directly from the Father I should give it up. If it is from Him,all of it goes right back in praise and adoration. It is not mine Lord... It ALL belongs to you. Today Lord my heart, my dreams, my pain, my fear, my joy. My praise, my gifts, my children,  my plans.... They are YOURS.

He's daddy

Last night the girls and I stayed with john's parents. Lily and I were laying down and she snuggled really close and said, " I want daddy" I hugged her tightly and said "momma is here... " Her reply ... "but he's daddy..."

Her heart is so beautiful. She felt safe and loved by her momma but she knows her daddy's love for her is beyond her imagination. I love how my girls love their daddy. They have taught me so much about how to trust and love my havenly Father as daddy. If this is something that is hard for you, let my daughters words ring true in your life, "HE is daddy" you can trust that without fail.

Rest

So- this week John is in okc working and I am staying with johns parents.i would stay at home, butbi am afraid of the dark. I would just lay awake being scared.  Yesterday someone was giving me a hard time about it. At first I was defensive then I thought, " why would I stay awake all night in fear when I could rest in peace?"

Hmmm...it seems odd that the choice of where I sleep is so easy but daily I choose to live away from the peace God offers me. I choose to worry and be anxious. I think I need to choose rest in all the areas of my life....

Coattails

Hi friends! This morning at the gym, a lady was just one machine behind me in the circut room. After a while she said "I like being after you because you set all the machines just right" 

Hmmm... It struck my heart quickly. Of course she does I am doing all the work. Then I thought how often I do this in my spiritual life. How often do I follow hearts of huge faith... But instead of learning faith for my own heart I get very comfotable riding on their faith coattails. I allow them to fight the good fight and reap the rewards of that fight.  Yes, follow the examples of great faith but be careful that you don't ride their faith forever.  

Security

Morning all! Last night I was logging onto online banking-- it asked me to change my password. I did. This morning I logged in and of course forgot my new password. To retrieve it, I had to go through about ten steps...but I got it.

  I began to think about all the ways we go about protecting our identity. We change passwords, get credit report updates..... But do we do anything to protect our spiritual identity ? Why do we not hop up every day and pray protection of our hearts against satans schemes? Or go further and get in Gods Word to protect our minds?  We do so much to protect our stuff.... Today let's protect our hearts.

In the way

Whew what a week-  love that it is Friday and love that it is beautiful! This week I have learned a lot about assisting. Something I have learned is that in the process of trying to assist, I get in the way a lot.
  It has made me think about how often my 'help' gets in the way of the gospel. We try to help others with our religion and in so we often push the true message of Christ aside.  Today I will try to assist in leading people to Christ without getting inthe way of Christ...

Ready

Yesterday was my first time to actually 'assist' dr. Reeder. I was so stinking nervous. As the time went on I saw that i need to be able to anticipate what he needs in order to treat our patient.  I need to be ready before he asks.

The more I thuught about this the more  I wondered why I do not treat my relationship with Jesus this very same way.  Why does He always have to ask me two or three times.before I respond? I should be ready before my Father asks. My answer should be yes in a moments time... What about you? Are you ready...

Standing

Friday night we had the all sports banquet at CHS. Afterward we needed to clean up and set up for an upcoming event. Tables and chairs were moved, floors were swept. As we were working I noticed that many people had left. Then I noticed how many people were standing around watching others work.

this picture was a great representation of the body of Christ. Some of us just soak it up and leave. Some of us soak it up and then stick around and watch the others work. And then there are those that are active... Working toward the goal that He has set before us. Where are you standing today?  If you've been watching for a while-- maybe it's time to get in there and work!

Warning

Last night I was, as I am sure a lot of you were, glued to my tv. Jim cantore was keeping me posted on the storms . I think I watched all night. my momma my three big sisters and my nanny all live in the hardest hit areas. They are all safe and without damage.  As  I watched twc, they kept replaying one scene again and again. It was the picture of a family coming out of their home. It took the reporters about two hours to finally say that the family had listened to the warnings and gotten in their safe room. I was so thnkful when they said that. I love people who listen to the weathermen and get in their shelters. As I lay down last night I thought about all the lost people in my life. Why do they not listen to The Father? Why are they waiting so long? Why do we as Christians wait until the last minute to seek shelter in Him? Stop waiting. seek His shelter at this moment....don't wait until the storm is right on top of you.

Time

This morning as I hopped up at 430am I began to think of what I make time for. I am willing to leave my house At 430 every morning to work out, but I am not willing to get up that early to spend time with Jesus. When it comes to making time to seve the giver of eternal life it seems I always run short on time. When there is something I want you better believe I make time for it! The last two weeks I have had devos on my heart each day but I have not taken time to write them. I am now writing via my new. IPhone and am telling you today that I have not made time to write His mesages down. I will do better.  I will make time to serve Him

scattered

This week has been so odd. I have used Lily's glitter- bubble gum flavored lip gloss, John's deoderant, hand soap on my face, foot lotion on my arms, taken excedrin (that has caffeine) instead of tylenol pm, and am currently wearing Lily's hair tie instead of my own. I have been completely scatter-brained! Not to mention that this morning, I found a dryer sheet in my pants....after I got to work. What in the world? Does anyone else feel like this?

I have nothing of great value to say today...just that if you are in a scatter-brained boat with me...let's stop. Take a deep breath and remember that while we may put a baby diaper on our three year old in the middle of the night instead of a pull up....God is never scatter-brained. He is never too tired and He never forgets our needs. Relax in Him for a moment won't you

mundane

This morning when I got to the gym, I hopped on the treadmill, as I do every morning...it's my routine. Well today was a cardio day...big cardio. I usually just up the incline, speed and mileage. But today I realized that my cardio was very mundane. My body has gotten used to the routine therein taking away the challenge and growth opportunities.

So, i decided to hop on the bike. I chose a program and off I went. 5 miles later, I was sweating and pushing to complete the last series. Whew. It was amazing! As I fell off the bike and headed out the door, the Lord prompted me with a question. Why is it that you are okay with a mundane spiritual life, but you will challenge yourself physically? Ouch. I get so caught up in my routine...that I don't realize how mundane my walk with Christ is. Or worse, I DO realize it and am perfectly fine to continue living it. Where is your walk today??

*on an informative note* I am taking a huge leap of faith in my career...by starting a new one! April 15th will be my last day at DHS. I am going to be an orthodontic assistant for Dr. Bruce Reeder in Lawton. Yes, he knows I know ZERO! But, he is willing to teach and I am willing to learn! Fire up for new jobs! Love you guys!!

weight

Okay, I am such a people watcher - love it! This morning I was people watching at the gym. One set of people captivated my attention. There was one guy attempting to lift weights AND watch a pretty girl at the same time. The more he thought she was watching, the more weight he added. After a while, this poor guy was struggling under way more weight than he could handle. But, he kept trying...struggling...fighting to lift a weight that was way beyond his limit.

As I lifted my tiny weights, I realized that is what my spiritual life looks like. I struggle and fight to carry a weight that is beyond what I can handle. I carry my own burden, my own brokenness until I am exhuasted. How many of us are doing that at this moment? Who among us is carrying a weight that is too heavy...and yet we continue to try. It's time to stop adding to the weight...it's time to lay it at the foot of the cross.

Easter costs less...

Last night I saw a Wal-Mart commercial. The catch phrase was, “Easter costs less at Wal-Mart” I could not get that phrase out of my mind. It just bothered me. Now, do not misunderstand, I love to buy Easter candy – the girls baskets, ruffle socks, and dresses are already purchased! But it was the phrase. Easter costs less.

Easter represents the greatest cost, the greatest sacrifice, the greatest love we will ever know. Easter cost the perfect Son of God His life. If Easter cost less, we would not be able to have an everlasting life in eternity with our Savior. Rejoice in great praise that the ultimate cost was paid for us…

why wait

I got to talk to a lady at the gym the other day. She started talking about why she was working out. She told me that she was going on vacation in two weeks and wanted to be is great shape. Then she said, I may have waited a little too long!

I thought about her comment while I was running. I do the same thing spiritually. I wait until the very last minute to consult God on my life. I wait until the week before I make a huge decision, then start praying about it. I wait until I am sick, then I pray for healing. I wait until the money is tight before I ask for provision and guidance where my finances are concerned. Why do we do this? What would happen if we consulted God the moment we had a thought…the second an opportunity arose, what if He was the first person we told about it? Why not live our lives in such a way that HE is our constant go to instead of our last resort…

investment

Sunday at church I spoke to a new couple that was visiting. I invited them to our SS class. The young lady said, “we are moving in a month and we don’t want to invest in a SS class and then move away.”

I didn’t know if I was more disappointed in her answer, or more disappointed that I understood her answer. Why do we do that? Why do we not take time to invest? Because we are afraid? Because we have been hurt too much in the past? Because we are lazy?

What is God calling you to invest in that you keep putting off? I challenge you today to let go of whatever your reasons are for staying away...for staying guarded…invest in God’s love today…the return will be worth the risk.

i forget

This morning, I got off the treadmill and walked over to get the sanitizer spray stuff. I walked back to where I was and began to clean. Well, I walked back to where I thought I was. The guy next to me had left, so I just guessed. The only reason I knew I was cleaning a random unused treadmill is that the lady behind me started giggling. it was funny! So I just cleaned a few of them for good measure!

The odd part was that it took me all of 23 seconds to forget which treadmill I had been on. I mean really? How could i forget so quickly? Hmmm...

James 1:22 "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like."

I am quick not only to forget my treadmill spot, but also to forget my Father's Word. Today, do not merely listen to the word, Live the Word.

before and after

Today, I was talking to my health mentor. I have finally reached all the goals we had set. She asked me to send before and after pictures. My first response was "puh-huh" the more I thought about it, the more I wondered if people can tell a difference in my life before and after Jesus. Can they tell that all my sin has been washed away? Can they tell that I am secure in my eternal salvation and that I worship the One King of Kings? Do I live my life in such a way that someone could see that my after is much better than my before?

the book

The other day, a friend of mine loaned me a book. It had been read many times over. When I held this book in my hands, I could tell it was treasured. As I looked at the book a question came to my heart…

If someone asked to borrow my bible, could they tell I treasured it? Could they tell that it has been read…or would the pages still be crisp because it is only opened on Sunday mornings…if at all? Why is it that we can read books time and time again, but the one book that is our guide, God’s Word…remains unopened? If someone asked to borrow your bible right this moment, would they have to wipe off the dust?

to please...

Yesterday, the girls and I were getting ready to come home from OKC. Lily said something about how excited she was to come home. My mom hugged her and said, “Don’t you want to stay at GG’s?” My mom said this to her out of love and in a joking manner, but Lily’s immediate response was, “I want to stay here…” In an instant, I saw my tiny daughter in a different light. Her heart is so beautiful. She has such a precious recognition of others feelings. Already at age 3, she aims to please.

Why do we strive so greatly to please other people in our lives, and please Jesus only when it suits us. Galatians 1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Our lives should be lived in reckless abandon to our Savior. Pleasing Him through our worship of Him.

name

Hi friends –

Yesterday as I was reading through emails, I noticed that each person in my life refers to me as a different name. To list a few:
Meagan, Meggs, Meggy Lou, little bit, box girl, platinum x2, logozo, x-imus, large frame, Meagan Beth, John’s wife, Momma, Babe, Meggs Lozeau, Mezcan…well you get the point. As I thought through this, I thought about how I mean something different to each person in my life. Just like God. He is

Abba – El Shaddai – Resurrection – Savior – Shepherd – The Way – The Truth – The Word – Elohim – Adonai – Yahweh – Shalom – Alpha & Omega – Ancient of Days – Christ – The Deliverer – I Am – King of Kings – Protector - Immanuel – Lame – Messiah – The Rock – Redeemer – Jehovah Rohi – Jehovah Jireh – Jehovah Rapha – Lord of Hosts -

He is all that we need. Call His Name – He will answer…

thoughts

Hi everyone! First I must apologize for the lack of writing the last couple of weeks. I don’t have any great stories to tell today. I just want to put my heart out there in an effort to remain transparent as I try to live my life as see through as I can. For a couple of weeks now, I have really been struggling. A few weeks ago I took my first teacher certification test. I failed. From that day until now, I have let satan convince me that I am just that…a failure. The sad part is that when I listen to satan once, it is very easy to let his thoughts consume my own – blocking out all TRUTH from Jesus. My entire family was sick for about 8 days which definitely added to the weight of stress and exhaustion. When I am in such a downward spiral of letting satan win, sin takes over. I stop reading God’s Word…stop praying…stop looking for God’s light and guidance because I am now convinced that I am all that satan says. Instead of rejoicing in who God KNOWS I am. Throughout this process, I stop writing. In his lies, satan convinces me that no one really needs to read what God is showing me. So I stop. I have started to write this email a hundred times, but the deceiver wins by reminding me of my failures and filling me with the fear that if people really knew my struggles, their love for me would be no longer. Today that ends.

Today in my effort to be transparent, I tell you that I have been letting satan win in my life. This morning when I woke up, I finally heard God’s voice. Calling me out of the darkness. This morning I listened. This morning as I drove to work, I decided that I would be different. I turned off my sad music and put in my Avalon. I let the words of the songs seep into my heart and ached to hear more of what Jesus says to me. This morning I yearned for TRUTH…and it was there as it always is…without fail.

Know today that if you are in a place of darkness, if you have become very comfortable in that place, you are not alone. God has not stopped talking to you or wanting you or loving you. He is there. It is time to take satan’s thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ. And if you can’t do this on your own, I am here. I am able to pray for you in a most empathetic way. I ask that you not give the darkness one more moment. Join me in the light…it is wonderful.

lets trade

Last night, Lily and I were making homemade suckers. She was having the best time! When we got them all made, she asked if she could lick the spoon. I said yes. She cleaned hers off fairly quickly and then she noticed that I still had mine. She said, “hey momma, let’s trade. You can have my spoon and I will take yours…” Of course, all the good stuff was gone from hers so I got an empty spoon in the trade.

As I watched my sweet daughter something occurred to me. That is what my relationship with Jesus looks like. Okay Lord, let’s trade. You take all my sin, my ugliness, my emptiness and trade me for complete fulfillment and peace in You. Better still, God beckons us to do this. Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest…for my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Today, what are you holding on to? Why not trade it in for the peace that passes all understanding?

wait on daddy

Yesterday we all (John, Lily, Claire and I) got home at the same time. I took Claire and Lily and was about to walk in the house when Lily sternly told me, "wait on daddy. we can't go in the house without him." My goodness, what was i thinking...trying to take a step without him?!

As we stood there waiting, it occurred to me how many times I take a step without waiting on My Daddy, My Abba Father. I just run ahead without thinking. When I really need to heed Lily Beth's words...."wait on daddy, we can't go without Him."


From Sherri - Barrett update:

Barrett is doing wonderful he is weighing in at a whopping 2lb 2 oz and measuring 14 ¼ inches

He is on fortifier for weight gain (pumping him up)
Up to 20cc a feeding

He has had some difficulty with constipation and they have been taking out about 5cc residual after feedings. However I just talked to Chase and the residual is down to about 3cc, hoping that this means that he is tolerating the fortifier better. These things seem to fluctuate a lot from day to day. One nurse said in the NICU it is taking two steps forward one step back.

He is a remarkable little guy and has a lot of spunk. Like most babies he enjoys being naked and gives them fits when they try to put the diapers back on. For a small guy he can really squirm and stretch those little legs out.

Kaci and Chase are the only ones holding him however; we are getting to touch him now.

Thanks for all of the prayers
Meggs Nease

shhh...

Okay, I have to set up the story for you! John is taking a bus driving class this week in Wayne America from 6pm to 10pm every night. So of course the girls are asleep when he gets home. This is hard on the girls because they are such daddy’s girls…both of them!

Last night Claire was crying for her daddy. Thankfully, he happen to call and check in. I handed the phone to Claire and told her to listen…daddy was on the phone. She looked and looked for him, but continued to cry. I said, “Claire bear…..shhh….listen…” she stopped crying and heard John’s voice. She leaned into the phone and just sat still, listening to every word he said. It was precious.

Then the Lord told me, “Meagan Beth….shhh…listen…” wow. I ache to hear the Lord. I look and look but most of the time, I do not stop running my mouth long enough to hear Him. It’s amazing what can happen when you “shhh…” I think I will try it more often.

reaching

This morning I went in to get Claire out of her bed. Note about Claire: if you just grab her up out of bed, you will hear about it. She prefers that you reach for her and when she is ready, she will come to you. So, I was reaching for her…for a while. Then she decided that she was ready to get out and came to me. We hugged and hugged. It was a wonderful start to my day.

As I was watching her this morning, I thought how perfect a picture it was of me and God. He is standing – arms stretched out. But He will never force me to come to Him. I must choose to reach out to Him. Where is your heart today? How long has God been waiting for you to reach out to Him?

promise

Hi friends –

Last night I was making dinner and Claire was so unhappy. She was crying for her daddy. I said, “Claire bear, daddy will be home in about five minutes…I promise” She ran over to the door and just stood there waiting for him. She kept looking back at me for reassurance that he really was coming. “I promise Claire, he is on the way…”

I love that about my girls, the way they love John. Last night Claire challenged me to live my life waiting with such anticipation and excitement for My Father to get to me. Our hope is secure in the One who promises everlasting life…in the One who promises to return. Let’s be excited about it!


**Barrett**
He continues to stay off all oxygen and from what I am being told this is a very remarkable thing for his size and age
He is now starting to gain back some weight and almost back to where he started out
He is up to 7cc of milk (started out at 2cc) and scheduled to increase again today

the storm

Good morning everyone! My goodness, I feel like I have not written in forever! I hope everyone made it through the storm sage and sound -

On Wednesday, we went to the grocery store to prepare for everything the weathermen said was coming. It was packed...absolutely out of control. When the storm hit Thursday and the power went out...I began to think of how everyone got prepared just as we were told to do. Then my heart sank - why is it that when the news told us to prepare, we did not hesitate. We took their word as truth. God has given us His Word, His Truth to read daily and prepare for the coming of Christ the King - - - and we do nothing. My question today is this - how prepared are you for the coming of the King? Are you taking His Truth to heart and preparing daily...telling everyone you know that HE is coming? If we will take a weathermans word as truth, why will we not accept the Risen Savior's promise to come again?

**continue to pray for all those without power. Also be praying as Central High, Marlow and many others are now facing life with very little water. pray restoration for the amazing electric company employees who are working round the clock to get our power back on**

just barely

This morning I was walking through the parking lot and a noticed something odd about a car near me. The passenger side mirror was just barely hanging on. It was just dangling beside the car. I just stared at it and kind of laughed. It was at that moment that the owner of the car said to me, “it hasn’t fallen off yet…so I just leave it.”

As I walked my mile hike from parking lot to office, I thought about how my life so often looks like that mirror. I am just dangling. And I get comfortable there because nothing too bad has happened to completely break me. Why do we live like this? Why do we go through life dangling when we have power of the Risen Savior living in us?

He doesn’t call us to live our lives just barley hanging on - If that is you today….let go. Let go and give it all to Him. He died that we may have life, and life to the fullest.

**Barrett update** He is doing well! Just talked to Sherri - they will be doing tests today to check his blood vessels. He was taken off his C-Pap which is a great thing. His at birth measurements were 1 pound 1 ounce and 12 3/4 inches long. God is huge! keep believing for Barrett!

Barrett

Sherri – a friend of mine (and some of yours)
Chase - Sherri’s son
Kaci –Sherri’s daughter-in-law
Barrett – baby

Kaci is 28 weeks pregnant with Barrett. Kaci was admitted to the hospital yesterday because Barrett is not growing as he should be. They have given Kaci steroids. Just got a text from Sherri that they would be taking Barrett today at 5pm. According to ultrasounds Barrett weighs 1pound 1 ounce.

We serve a huge God. Stop whatever you are doing at this moment and believe with me in the Great Physicians Hand. He has a plan for this tiny boy. Pray readiness for the doctors and nurses that will be attending to precious Barrett. Pray a sweet stillness over Kaci and Chase.

PINK

Hey all! Welcome to think PINK. Thanks for reading! For all of you who are new to the devos PINK stands for

Priase Him in every circumstance
Intercede for others
Nourish the Spirit through bible study
Kindle the flame by spreading the gospel

Hope you live today thinking PINK

but daddy

Last night John got lily ready for bed. They laid down on the couch. In a few minutes I heard Lily… “but daddy…” John was telling her that it was time to go to sleep – with every reason he offered she replied “but daddy…” It was difficult not to smile because her tiny voice is so sweet.

I was praying as I got into bed and began to think of all the times the Lord asks me to do something and my reply is much like Lilys. Lord I see why you are asking me to do this but I am so busy… I know Lord but I am so tired… I know Lord but I think someone else would do it better… My prayer last night and this morning was to serve the Lord when asked…no ifs ands or buts…

as long as it

Yesterday I overheard someone say, “that will be fine…as long as it doesn’t interfere with my stuff.” I thought about that statement a lot yesterday afternoon. About how often I say that to God when He asks me to do something. “sure Lord, I will serve, witness, surrender, _____ as long as it doesn’t interfere with all my plans.” How many of us serve God as long as it isn’t an inconvenience? Today I am praying that I will say yes to the Lord regardless of my stuff …all else will have to wait.

missed it

This weekend we had a youth event at church called IMPACT. It was awesome! So many decisions made for Christ. On Sunday morning, the band that had been leading worship all weekend did the Sunday service also – instead of the choir. An elderly lady came and sat next to us. As soon as she saw the drums and the guitars she said, “I hate this kind of music.” I was so angry. As the band played the lady scowled. My anger disappeared and I was broken hearted for her. Because she was so intent on showing her disapproval for the music, she missed the words that were being sung. She missed seeing 100+ high school students worship in reckless abandon to their Savior. She missed seeing the tears stream down faces of lives that were changed. She missed Jesus.

The truth is, I do the same thing. When I met a few of the students this weekend my first reaction was “hmm…this one is different.” Thankfully, God shut me up quickly and gave me the opportunity to see Him shine in every student…even the ones I thought were odd. I pray that I will not miss one second of the sweet message of Jesus because I am too wrapped up in the package it comes in…

freak flag

Do any of you have those people in your life that you would really like to be friends with? There is one lady that I know, and I would love to be her friend! She just shines the love of Christ and is always so put together…never a hair out of place. How some women do this…I have no clue. I have had the chance to talk to her a couple of times. And each time I make myself look absolutely ridiculous! I am usually pretty good at speaking to people, but for some reason I am sure that when I walk away from our conversations she is thinking “what just happened? Is that girl always like that?!”

I ran into her today at Wal-Mart and of course looked dumb, started an awkward conversation about nothing and walked away just laughing at myself. What in the world! I got in the truck and laughed some more! Then, I thanked the Lord whole-heartedly that even when I come to Him with strange questions, stuttering speech and concerns that might not really make sense… He understands even when I don’t. He will listen as long as I need Him. What a comfort! So, to all of you out there who have had these moments, let you freak flag fly high! God loves us just as we are!

it will hurt

Last night, Lily told us that her foot hurt. I said, “let me look at it.” She ran to her room yelling “no momma…it will hurt.” The last time her foot hurt, she had a splinter in it. It was not an easy process getting it out. She remembers the pain…not the joy of living splinter free.

So many of us are living life just like Lily. We remember the pain, so we guard ourselves from anything or anyone that could potentially hurt us. God calls us to love, to trust - we run. I might get hurt Lord…I would rather live with a splinter in my foot. We continue to live life hobbling around half-hearted – wholly guarded. 1 John 4:18 reads, there is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out all fear. God calls us to let Him love us with a perfect love and through that we must love others. It is time to stop hobbling through life with a splinter in my foot. I will live unafraid in Christ. Will you?

the physician

Yesterday Claire woke up with the croup. With all of her allergy / asthma difficulties we have trained ourselves to listen for her breathing. This was a cough and congestion I have never heard. I took her to David and Sherrie’s to make sure I wasn’t overreacting as I sometimes can…especially where Claire’s breathing is concerned. We all decided she needed to go to the doctor. When I got her to the office the doctor listened to her for a long time…checked her oxygen levels…the works. He said she had a respiratory virus and the croup. He said it was very good that we brought her in because the croup can be dangerous for babies with asthma.

This morning on the way to work I was praying for Claire. I began to think about my spiritual life and how much better it would be if I checked things before they got too bad. Instead of allowing a sin to become a stronghold…repent and seek strength the moment the sin occurs. Instead of allowing myself to become spiritually empty…why not be refreshed daily by His heart. Apologize and heal a broken friendship before a lifetime of anger and bitterness has passed.

How are you today? What is it in your life that you have let go too far? Why wait any longer…The Great Physician can heal your heart today.

lost

This morning, I parked in a new place here at the hospital. I had to go in a different entrance than I am used to so when I got into the hospital I was completely turned around. At one point I found myself in a very long hallway in what seemed like a dungeon. I straightened up my shoulders and bravely walked toward what I thought was a doorway. I got to the end only to find that the doorway was for people who had an access code…that person I am not. I stood there…took a breath and said, “Show me the way Lord.” A few moments after my whole hearted, half afraid prayer a man stepped into the hallway and asked what I was doing there. I replied as honestly as I could “I have no idea. But, good morning to you!” He laughed and kindly volunteered to show me to my office.

I followed closely as to not get left in the CCMH dungeon alone. I watched him carefully as he taught me the way to go. When I finally sat down at my desk, 20 minutes after parking my car, I thought about how often I get off my spiritual path and end up alone in the darkness of my own choices. I thought of Psalm 86 that reads teach me your way o Lord and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart. My prayer today is to follow the teachings of My Lord so I will continue on His path…not getting lost trying to make my own.

prepare a table

This year one of our New Year’s resolutions as a family is to set the table for dinner every night. It has been so wonderful so far! The other night, Lily was setting the table. I would hand her one plate at a time. She was so careful with the dishes. She set the plates with such sweet thought. As I watched her my heart grew.

And in that moment, God reminded me that He has gone to prepare a place for me. No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those that love him”. God has taken special care to prepare a table for us in glory! Are you prepared for the day He calls you home?

Love you all so much!

man vision

Last night John was looking for Lily’s toothbrush. He said “I have looked everywhere.” Really everywhere I wondered. I went in search and was back in about 2 minutes…toothbrush in hand. What is it with man vision?! They look one place and call that everywhere!

After relentlessly teasing my oh so handsome husband, I laughed and began to think about how my spiritual vision is much like man vision. Lord, I have searched out your heart for the plan…I don’t see it. Lord, I cannot see you anywhere…I have looked. Lord, are you sure it’s here? I wonder how often I have missed the Lord’s message even though it was right in front of me. If you have mans’ vision in the place of God’s its time to look with new eyes…HIS eyes.

an exaggeration

A little while ago I was listening to someone tell a story. Now, I knew that parts of the story were exaggerated. Granted, it made the story better, but I kept thinking – why not just tell the story like it really happened.

I thought more about it at lunch. Then, I thanked the Lord that nothing, not one thing about Him is exaggerated. He created the heavens and the earth. He sent His one and only Son to earth, a baby born of a virgin. Jesus did live a perfect life free from all sin. Jesus did walk on water. He did heal the sick and make the blind to see. He died on a cross for our sin and three days later was raised to life. He is the Risen Savior. His word is active and alive. He is the Alpha, Omega, beginning and the end. He is the living water and all who drink from Him will never thirst again. Never and exaggeration needed – HE IS THE KING OF KINGS!

oh the snow

I love the snow! Love it! One of my favorite things is when all the snow has fallen and everything is wonderfully white…before it has been tramped by animals and people. Yesterday I was looking at our yard thinking that it was a lot prettier before the snow had begun to melt. Then, the snow began again! Yay! I just stood in it and let it fall all around me…

The snow fall is a wonderful representation of how forgiveness works. We are as white as snow when we ask Jesus to be our Lord and Savior. All our sin is forgiven. The sin in our life tramples the beauty of Christ’s love. Then, we repent of our sin and just like the beautiful snow we got yesterday, we are forgiven…beautiful once again.

The wonderful news of Christ is that no matter how trampled your life is by sin, it can all be forgiven. All we have to do is surrender to the Savior and we will be as pure as the new fallen snow…

free

This weekend we were driving to Tulsa. Claire was not happy to be in her car seat for that long. When we got to the hotel, I unbuckled her. Instead of jumping out, she just sat there…still crying. She had been so frustrated with being trapped in the seat, that she didn’t notice the freedom I offered her.

Hmm. She is a lot like me. I get trapped in sin that becomes a stronghold. But instead of reaching for the freedom that God offers me I continue to cry…trapped. All Claire had to do was acknowledge that I was waiting on her to reach for me. And that is all God is asking of us…

true to His word

Some things I have learned this Christmas season:
invisible tape…not really invisible.
all day lipstick….doesn’t really last all day.
customer service with a smile…just service minus the smile
“while supplies last” usually means they have 3.
2-day shipping….the 1st day is really the second full day after you place the order
1 hour photo…usually 2
slim fast controls hunger…Not a chance!


Those are just a few things! I have learned that guarantees are not what they seem. I have begun to laugh at most everything that “guarantees”. While laughing at these things I am reminded that God’s Word is true. It is never failing. Every promise He makes…you can count on. His Word is the only guarantee you need!

gifts

This weekend, we had the Living Christmas Tree at church. To say the least, it was fabulous! I had the best time! There is nothing better than standing in a 30’ Christmas Tree singing about Jesus! During one song, we had three wisemen walk down and present gifts to the baby Jesus. It brought tears to my eyes every time I saw it – it was just beautiful. Every time this happened God prompted my heart with this question, “Meagan, what gifts are you bringing to glorify my Son?” I began to make a list of how great I am and all the Godly things I do. As though the Creator actually wanted me to make a list. By the 4th time we sang this song, I had gotten the hint.

The 4th time my heart was prompted, I simply listened. I did not try to answer the question. When I shut my mouth and just listened to my Father, He provided the answer I needed. You see, I usually just give the gifts I am comfortable with. He has given me gifts that I would rather not present because I am not confident in myself. He assured me yesterday that He was not asking me to be confident in my abilities. He was asking me to be confident in His ability to use my gifts to glorify His Kingdom. What are your gifts….are you offering them to His glory every day?

in unison

Last night we had choir practice – I really love going to choir! A few times last night, I just stopped and listened…and it was awesome! One of the awesome things to hear is when we all sing in unison. When we are doing just as we should, it sounds like one voice. Incredible. But if just a few people are off…it throws the song off.

As I listened and prayed the Lord showed me that my spiritual walk should be in unison with His perfect plan for my life. If I am seeking His face daily above all else, my steps and His plan will be one. I can assure you, that is not the case all the time. When I take my eyes off of Him – the paths become two. Today my prayer is that that my wants will match His will for me. I pray that my life will be in unison with His heart…

on E

On the way home from work Monday, I noticed that I was almost out of gas. It was beautiful Monday afternoon – I should have stopped to gas up. My light came on about 5 miles from the house. I passed the gas station knowing I could make it home and back before I ran completely out of gas. I was not at work yesterday, so when I hopped in my car this morning to come to work there it was. The fuel light on and the gage resting below E.
So I had to stop…in the rain…and fill up this morning.

The craziest thing about all of it was that I had the opportunity to fill up on Monday, when it was beautiful outside. But, I didn’t. The Lord prompted me with a question this morning. “Are you doing the same with your spiritual life?” stink.

Do you run on E spiritually? Do you pack your schedule so full that you don’t notice you are almost out of fuel? Are you like me? You notice that you are on E, but you don’t take the time to meet with Jesus and refill. Most of the time I am so worn out from all my Godly activities that I am too tired to meet with God - - see the problem with that?

Today my prayer is that I will not let my life run on E. I will take time to meet with Jesus before everything else and trust that He is enough to fill me.

steady

Yesterday, I was walking out of church. I was holding Claire, her bag, and Lily’s hand. I had about 10 steps to go down. A gentleman at our church came up and offered to help. Being prideful, as I am sometimes, I almost said no. Before I could - his arm was under my elbow steadying me as I carried Claire and helped Lily Beth down all those steps. I was relieved because I was just a little off balance -

Why are we so full of pride? How many times have you turned down an offer for help? Even if it is just a little help, like a steadying hand. This gentleman showed me a picture of God yesterday. God sees that we need help and He is there to steady us. Maybe just for a moment…but He is there. Why is it so difficult for us to relinquish control and let God step in and steady all that is off balance in our lives?

Are you off balance today? If you are, He is there to steady you…

take a minute

Yesterday I went to JC Penny to look for some new britches. Found some – on sale – had a coupon – saved more than I spent – FABULOUS! Anyway, when I got to the register, I was in a hurry. When I am in a hurry it always seems like I get the slowest possible cashier…anyone else? I was trying not to be “that” customer as I waited sort of patiently. Then she began to start up a conversation. ARG. Do not have time. I was about to give her the half polite “mmm –hmmm” as to signal her that my time was much more important than her story. Before I did, I felt God pull at my heart. Listen… I am listening to you Lord…what is it? NO…listen to HER. Stink. Okay Lord. I will listen but I don’t have that much time okay… Just listen to her. This is usually how conversation with me and the Big Guy goes. He commands…I try and do a half hearted reply…He commands…I finally do.

As I stopped and really listened to this woman…I found that her story was much more important than my time. It wasn’t a story of great significance or entertainment. It was simply her way of starting a conversation. I stood and chatted with her for a little while. In the end she told me how nice it was for someone to slow down long enough to talk. Oh my! If she had only heard my thoughts!!

Yesterday God used my self-important…too busy…hurried attitude to teach me. HE is never too hurried to listen to my stories. HE will never ask me to skip the details so He can go about His day. HE is always willing to take a minute to listen…even if I just want to tell Him something silly. Live today knowing that you serve a God who is never in too big of a hurry….and He expects us to serve others in the same manner…

look up

On Sunday, John and I had to leave church a little early. I sit in the choir, so I told him to watch for me to get up so he could follow. I got up and walked into the hallway to meet him. I waited and waited. No john. He finally looked up at the choir and noticed that I was gone, so he came out to meet me. I thought, what a perfect devo moment. I had my devotional all ready to go for Monday morning. Monday morning came around and zero. I woke up in a horrible mood….Claire was sick…had to iron clothes…blah blah. Was so frustrated that I cried all the way to work. Definitely no devo yesterday…I just couldn’t write it.

On the way home the Lord spoke to my heart. He said Meagan, this morning when you woke up…did you look up? God is really good at using my devotionals to convict my heart. Just like John – he forgot to look up therein missing my signal that it was time to leave. I forgot to look up and my day was awful. I forgot to look up to my Father and ask Him to join me in my day. I forgot to look up and I missed the message that I live forgiven. I forgot to look up and praise Him for all my blessings….so I missed the blessing of a beautiful crisp morning. It is amazing what you miss when you forget to look up….

his glory

Yesterday I was in the waiting room at my doctor’s office. There was a really pretty picture on the wall that I was admiring. A young lady said, “my dad made that…isn’t he amazing?” The part about her statement that I loved was that she immediately gave the praise to her dad. My heart sunk a little as I thought about my day.

Someone said, “you have a beautiful smile…” I thanked them and went about my day…as if my smile is my own. I didn’t even pause to thank my Creator for giving me a smile to share. Mother nature takes the glory for the beautiful weather…john and I take the glory for our beautiful girls…the doctor gets the praise for fixing Claire’s ears… When did we stop glorifying the giver of all life? God gave me my smile…He created my gorgeous girls…He gave the doctor the gift of healing…He made the sunshine

My prayer is that today I will stop and give Him the glory. My Father is amazing…and I need to tell Him!

invitations

Yesterday I was finishing up the girls birthday party invitations. As I was putting them in their envelopes, I began to pray. God issues me an invitation daily…to come meet with Him.

I began to pray for all of us who need to answer the invitation He sweetly offers in Matthew “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest”

I prayed for all the lost people in my life. Those who have not answered His invitation to have everlasting life through His Son Jesus.

What is God inviting you to do today? Are you among the tired…the weary…. Are you among those who need to spend time with Him today…. Are you lost? The invitation stands….it’s up to you to accept it.

expecting

Last night about midnight I heard Lily’s tiny feet on the tile in the kitchen….she was on her way to our bed. This is a nightly occurrence. When I hear her, I put my arms out so she can find me easily. Last night was no different. I was reaching for her before she even got there…

Last night was the Lord kept me awake after she crawled in bed. He reminded me that His arms are out even before I ask. He is reaching for me before I get there. What a gift. He knows your need - - He is reaching to you to meet it. Go to Him. Snuggle under the sweet cover of His grace. He’s expecting you…

sorry

On Saturday I caught Lily doing something she was not supposed to be doing. She said, “sorry momma.” Okay – I started to walk away and she did it again. Stinker. I was just about to get onto her when this thought ran through my mind. Are you really sorry if you keep doing it?

I wanted to get angry with Lily, but God needed me to listen to Him. He was aching to speak to me and I wasn’t listening. So like many other times, He used my daughter. When you have sin in your life, do you say you are sorry just to clear your heart? I do. But there is a vast difference between being sorry and being repentant. Too often I take advantage of my Christianity. I think I can just say I am sorry and walk away. But let me tell you friend, until you are truly repentant….the sin remains.

Today don’t just be sorry. Let the Savior of your soul bring peace to your truly repentant heart…

you belong with him

Yesterday a lady was in my office commenting a picture I have on my desk. The picture is of my oh so hot husband! My co-workers know the picture I am referring to!! It is my FAVE! As she was looking at my picture she said, “ you look like you belong with him…” I took that as a HUGE compliment!

After she walked out a question came on my heart. Do I look like I belong with Jesus? Can people tell I am a Christian? I can say honestly that some days I do not shine for Him. My question for you is does your life reflect His love? Do you live your life in such a way that people could say without hesitation that you and Jesus belong together? My prayer for my life today is this - - Lord today above all else, I want to shine for you. Help me live my life so that others question why I am different. Lead them to ask me why….and Lord when they do, give me the courage and boldness to answer…Lord today it has to be all about your Glory - -

I will be praying that for you today also! Love you!

can't see you

This morning started off a little rocky for me. I get up at 5:00 so I will have an hour to get myself together before the girls hop up. This morning Lily Beth decided that she would hop up at 5:15. So, everything I normally do…I was doing with a tiny helper. I was walking down the hall to her room to get her clothes - -she was a few steps behind me. I heard her tiny voice say “wait momma….I can’t see you…” I hadn’t thought about turning the hall light on so it was very dark. I stopped and said, “ I am right here Lil “ She was comforted by the sound of my voice…even though she could not see my face.

I get so frustrated with life because I want to know all the steps immediately. Most of the time the Lord only shows me one step at a time. Leaving me feeling like I am alone in the dark. When I have this feeling I call out to Him. He never fails to show me His light. He doesn’t hesitate to say I am right here child. Today, if you are feeling like you are alone on your path…remember…He has not left you. Even when you can’t see Him, listen for His voice. He is right there…

where is He

Today I was making a list of things I needed to get done. My list was from greatest to least significance. For those of you that have been praying for me lately, you know I have been struggling with life. Just life in general. Today as I was making my list, God asked where He would be on my life list. I just cried.

I love Jesus so much. But He has not been first on my list. To be perfectly transparent, He hasn’t been close to first. Why do we do this? I am trusting that I am not the only one. We have so much life to live…so many important things to do. And the giver of Life is at the bottom of our list. We try every way to justify it…but the truth is…there is no justification in putting the Savior of our souls anywhere but the top. Where is He on your list right now? At this very moment? Can you say without hesitation that He is #1. That nothing and no one comes before Him? If He is not THE LIST….your list needs to be changed.

its in my eyes

On Saturday we were all in the car driving to Walters. Lily was in the backseat. She yelled to us, "the sun is in my eyes." Sure enough the birght sunshine was beaming on her! There was no blocking it. We tried everything, but we just couldn't get the sun out of her eyes...

The lesson of her sweet words didn't sink in until later that night. When life frutrates me, I tend to search for solutions in all the wrong places before I go to God. I want to handle it all on my own. I was doing just this on Saturday night. I finally stopped and tried to let my mind rest. When I cleared the rest of the world out....I could finally hear the Lord speaking to me. The Son is in your eyes....He is right there....stop trying to block Him out. Again, through the eyes of a child - -

I always try to block out the Son, because I think my way is better. I think I should be in control. And I fear what God will ask of me if I truly let Him be soveregn in my life. See, the SON is always shining on us. His light cannot be blocked no matter what we do. We can ignore Him, but we can't block HIm. Today instead of complaining beucase the sonshine is so bright.....bask in His glory and praise Him because He chooses to shine on us...

prevention

This morning sweet Claire had to go to the doctor. He said she has a throat infection. He gave her strong antibiotics to prevent it from going to her ears. A soar throat for her leads to infections elsewhere which can effect her asthma. Pray for sweet Claire.

I was reading over the prescription and thought about the sin in my life. It starts with something small…but inevitably leads to something else. Does this happen in your life? You think, oh I can handle a little….no big deal. I will just take one drink…I will just tell this small lie….i will just take one step off the path…Then before you know it you are in the grip of satans stronghold. Many times when this happens in my life I realize that I hadn’t covered the possibility of that sin with prayer. I know my weaknesses and I cover them with prayer daily. I learned the hard way that any area of my life not covered by prayer and protection from my Father leaves me wide open for Satan’s schemes.

My hope is that, like the doc, you will take preventative steps to guard you heart from the strongholds of sin -- Get in the Word. Pray protection over you life so that satan has no way of getting in. Because as strong as satan is….He is nothing compared to the Almighty..

todays

Yesterday a friend of mine was inquiring as to when I was going to send out the devo. I said, ‘ I did’ (at the time I didn’t know I really hadn’t sent it! Oops) She said, “oh I probably read it and passed it on….” Love people sharing the devos! I thought about what she said. For some reason it wasn’t sitting well with me. Of course, the Lord had something to teach me. I prayed about the feeling that was sitting heavy on my heart. His response….

That is what you do Meagan. You read my Word but you don’t remember that you read it. You might even pass it on to a friend, but did you let it sink into your Spirit. He then let His Word speak to my heart. James 1:22 – 25 reads “ Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does”
If I am merely reading His Word because I am supposed to…what is the point? If I do not let His Word guide my every step and penetrate my heart to its very core…why read it? Read His word to praise Him. Read it to hide it in your heart. Read it to LIVE IT.

i just need to...

Last night John and I were double-teaming Claire Bear. A note about my youngest - - she hates getting her diaper changed. The only things she hates more than that is putting clothes on. Wow. it is a challenge to say the least! Our sweet girl can squirm with the best of them! We had an idea last night. John was going to give her a bottle while I got her dressed. So, I put the pj top on her and john put the bottle in her mouth. Needless to say it did not work. She just had to hold the bottle. She wouldn’t let john hold it for her. The plan completely backfired because she could not hold the bottle and get the sleeves on… gee whiz.

While we were laughing at ourselves for our attempted trick, God showed me that I am Claire where the control of my life is concerned. I will let Him have a lot….almost all of the control. But I just have to keep one hand in the work. I need to have a portion of the control which always leads to confusion, distraction and mess. If I would let Him be completely Sovereign in my life, things would go much more smoothly. Praise the Lord I am a work in progress. As I prayed to give up control He reminded me of Phil. 1:6 which says “He who began a good work in you….will be faithful to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.” For all of you who belong to the control freak club….there is great Hope for us yet….

Love and hugs on this beautiful day!

another way

Yesterday I was at the hospital training for the job I will be doing there. I had to use the ladies room so off I went. As I was walking back from the restroom a lady said to me, “you know there is a much easier way to get to the restroom.” Hmm. I knew there was an easier way but I was confident in the way I went. I knew the route and I knew I would not get lost as I might have trying to go the shortcut way through the maze that is Comanche County Hospital! I thanked her and went on my way.

On the way home I began to think about her comment and about my spiritual journey. On my journey there have been opportunities to take easier and faster routes. It is always tempting to take a short cut….to do things my way and get there as fast as I can so I don’t have to wait on God’s timing. But it never fails that when I do that I end up lost. My salvation is always secure but the plan for my life then has to be re-routed to get back in line with God’s path. Today I am praying that I remember what that lady said to me. I am praying that even when I see a short cut in life….i will stick to the path I am confident He has laid for me. Why get lost in a maze when His way is right in front of you?

dwindling

Friday night I was at the Central High football game….Go Bronchos! We won 60 to 12! I was sitting in the stands and noticed that there were not very many people in attendance. This is usually the case at the end of the season if the team has not done exceptionally well. It made me sad. If the boys were undefeated, the stands would be packed.

On the way home I thought about how my spiritual life is a lot like the Broncho fans. When I first got saved I was so pumped! I was reading my bible ever day, I was praising every chance I got! This didn’t just happen when I got saved. When I hear an awesome sermon that truly convicts my heart and I fall to my knees at the alter….i feel renewed and ready to conquer the world. But then….I dwindle. Life becomes mundane….or life becomes difficult and the praising ceases. The bible reading is replaced by my favorite tv show….and I am back to a half-lived life for Christ.

Does anyone else ever feel like this? I wish I had the magic cure of how to stay passionate all the time. Today I woke up and challenged myself to remember just how awesome the God is serve is. I remembered that He gave His one and only Son for my life. I remember that His Son suffered on a cross for my sin and died asking His Father to forgive me. I remembered that on the third day God looked down at His Son and said arise My Love. And HE DID. He rose from the dead. He is alive today. I serve a RISEN and LIVING Savior. I am praying that each morning I remember how amazing that really is. I pray that I will stand in AWE of the resurrection every single moment. If that is not enough to live a life fully devoted to Christ….i don’t know what is….

the return

Every week at church someone prays for the men and women that are in the military who are deployed. I cry every time. I love this country so so much! This last Sunday we had the joy of welcoming home one of our deployed soldiers…he returned safely. HUGE praises! The pastor welcomed him and everyone stood up and cheered! It was awesome!!

Throughout this week I have been thinking about when Jesus comes home to get us. What a day of rejoicing that will be!! I think of how excited the girls get when john comes in from football practice and it has only been 12 hours since they saw him last. Can you imagine what it will be like when the King of Kings returns? The trumpet will sound, the clouds will part and there He will be on a white horse ready to claim His bride – every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is Lord! There will be no room for doubting….He WILL BE. My prayer at this moment is that if you do not know Him as your personal Savior is that you run…don’t walk to the cross. Fall before Him and let Him forgive you. If you have a moments hesitation about who He really is….clear it up today. Don’t let another second go by because only the Father knows when His Son will return….will you be ready to welcome Him?

its all yours

Saturday night I got to go to OKC and see sweet baby Conner. He is perfect by the way! I was in love in an instant! On the way to the city I was listening to a Steven Curtis Chapman CD. I kept replaying his song its all Yours. I love this song. I have really been struggling with some things lately and I needed to be reminded that it all belongs to Him.

When I got to Lola’s house and held sweet Conner I just cried. I realized that just as I had done with my daughters, Lola has to give Conner back to our Heavenly Father. We are called to give everything and everyone to our Creator. I just sat and held him and cried sweet tears as I prayed over his perfect little heart. On the drive home I played the song again and turned the volume way up. I cried and sang and prayed that I would live my life in complete surrender to Christ….giving everything good and bad to the cross.

Wherever your life is right now…at this very moment….it belongs to Him. If you got a promotion or found out you are having a baby, or you just got your first new home or your first love….ALL the joy and glory are His. If you got a bad report from the doctor….if you are battling ongoing illness and pain…if your marriage is hurting….if money never seems to go far enough….the pain, worry, frustration and fear all belong to your Savior. If you let it go, it will become His. And if you think for a moment that you can handle it on your own…you are very mistaken. If God could create the world in 6 days and send His only Son to die for you….don’t you think He can handle your life’s troubles - - -

between

Last night between work and choir practice, I went to Atlanta Bread to study using fancy WIFI as opposed to my dial up at home! Love fast internet! When it was time to go I gathered my things and headed for the door. There were so many tables between me and the exit. I had to walk around and in between….felt like an obstacle course.

When I got to choir and we began singing, I felt like there was a cap on my worship. I began to pray about why. God reminded me how I had things between me and the exit at the restaurant. He asked gently , “what is between you and I?” I knew there was something. I knew the exact moment it came between my Father and myself. But I still allowed it to happen. Then when I was ready to praise…nothing. I was still singing, but I knew my heart wasn’t right so the praise wasn’t either.

Is there anything between you and your Savior today? Do you feel like there is something hovering over your prayers…your worship…you life? Whatever it is doesn’t belong there…it isn’t worth it. Nothing is worth hindering your relationship with Christ. The gap between you and eternal life has been covered by a cross….surrender today. be forgiven today. What is standing in your way?

give it all

Okay, I am a candy fanatic! Love candy! I have a super cute candy dish for Halloween up in my cube ( it is a big ceramic witches shoe!! Too cute) I try to keep it full. The other day I was getting so frustrated because the same people kept coming and taking all the candy. Umm..hello…one piece at a time. The more they took the angrier I got. I was going over all this in my mind and I finally stopped and listened to God’s still small voice…

Meagan…this is a picture of how my love works. Huh? Sometimes I have to ask a couple of times before I get the concept. The more I prayed and listened I realized that I do this to God a lot. I take and I take…some days giving nothing back in return. But He never stops giving. All He ask is that I praise and glorify Him in all I do. but when I don’t….His love does not stop. See, I have to give with no expectation. I have to love without expectation. When I offer candy…I have to offer it wholeheartedly….to everyone. No matter how much they take. If they want the entire bowl – I must be willing to give it all….or I am not really willing.

Today my goal is to be thankful that God gives His love and grace to be in such awesome abundance. My prayer is that I will give to others in the same manner…

the lights

So, Friday night I was driving to the football game at Alex. John kept calling to make sure I wasn’t lost….as if I actually get lost!? The last time he called he said, “just look for the lights.” I love small towns and football. It is true that if you are ever lost in a country place on a Friday night…look for the lights. Sure enough…you will be found.

Today I was thinking about those lights and wondering if my love for Christ shines as brightly as the football lights. Matthew 5:14 reads, "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden” I am called to be that city on a hill. When there is a lost soul around me…they should see His light in me. When a sister or brother in Christ is struggling, I am called to help them find their way out of the darkness. How brightly do you shine for Jesus? Is your love for Him overshadowed by the fear of others opinions? Are you living the shadowy life or are you that City on a Hill?

This weekend when you see those football lights….ask yourself…could I be the light to lead someone to Christ…and if so…am I constantly shining?

fog

This morning was beautiful at my house! I walked out on my porch and just stood for a moment. Little crisp…and there was a fog laying across our pasture. It was like a painting.

As I drove into town, I noticed the fog clearing up. Just recently, the last month have not been living my life in reckless abandon to His throne. I have felt like there has been a covering on my worship. Have you ever felt like that? Like you are hindered by a heavy fog on your heart?

There is hope! Just as the fog lifted off the pastures this morning, the fog over I would say, the fog over my spiritual life has started to clear. Since about April, I have felt like I was living in a fog. I never stopped loving Jesus, but I you heart will lift also. When you are ready to see His face clearly…it will lift. When you run to Him offering nothing but sincere worship…the heaviness will lift. When the fog is finally gone…there He will be in all His amazing Glory - - sitting on His throne welcoming you into His awesome presence. Don’t let the fog take over your life… the clearing is not far ahead….

do your part

Yesterday I had a client say something to me that truly astounded me. We were discussing the decrease in the food stamps on the case. This client said, “do you expect me to buy my own food?” Hmm…sometimes I think my clients have this thought but I have honestly never had one say it out loud. My only response was, “mmm hmmm.” Could not think of anything else to say.

I was working on this particular client’s case again today and really began praying about what they had said to me. Do I treat God like this? He gives me the tools I need and the light to show me the way and still I expect more from Him. I expect to just sit around and get every blessing He offers with nothing from my end. I am my client. Wow.

My whole heart cry today is that I will do more than my part. I want to go above and beyond for His glory. I know I will forever be undeserving of His grace. I will recognize He gives us the tools we have to do our part. I will not be expectant of more when I am completely and utterly blessed to call Heaven my Home. Jesus did His part…it is time that I do mine.

whose plays are you running

This season has brought new weather and lessons for my little family. We are all adjusting to life as a coach’s family. I love it!! Absolutely could not do life as well as we do without John’s parents – they are our greatest help. I am learning to adjust to late nights and odd times. I like when john gets home and tells me about practice. He was telling a particular story last night and I began to think about the boys on our team.

During summer practice, they were pumped up! Came out the first game – did exactly what they had been taught and won! Second game they were a little overly confident, got beat. Third game…run ruled. As I thought this through, it occurred to me that my spiritual life is a lot like this season of football. When I first became a Christian I was on fire, pumped up! I was winning battles left and right! I was unstoppable. Then I got a little big for my britches. I started to forget what I had been taught…started to run plays on my own. Got beat a few times and eventually pummeled by satan’s attacks.

The funny part to me is that when the boys do exactly as the coaches have taught…victory. When I do exactly as God has taught me…victory. Why we choose so many times to go outside of our teaching I will never know. Are you running plays you have been taught? Or are you running plays you have made up?

Love you all!! I haven’t said it in a while, but thanks for reading and sharing these with others! I pray each time I send one that God is reaching the hearts of the lost and the found…

walking with my dad

Friday night I went to the football game to cheer on the Bronchos! I was watching the football team run out on to the field before the game started. Something caught my eye. It was a young man walking next to his dad. I love this kid - - and I love watching him with his father. There is something about the way he carries himself when he is with his dad. He is confident…brave…unshakable.

Then I noticed a sweet little boy playing all by himself. He was actually setting up hurdles…for what reason I have no idea - -mind you he was only about 3. He was okay, but he was completely vulnerable…exposed…all alone.

I began to think about the way I look when I am truly walking with my Father. Do I look like the young man or the little boy? I would love to say that my walk of faith looks like the young man. Completely covered in my Father’s love and guidance…confident in whose I am and where I am going…unwavering in devotion. But more often that not, I look like the little boy. Playing all alone just trying to figure life out. I am exposed and completely vulnerable to satan’s attacks.

My heart cry is that I will take on the role of the young man. I want to be under the umbrella of my Father’s Sovereignty without fail. Today, if you are playing alone, setting up hurdles for no reason, look to your Father. He is waiting to give you perfect direction…walk with Him, won’t you?

there is a way out

Okay, ready for this one?

Last night Lily Beth and I got to go to Disney on Ice at the state fair! We were both so excited!! We got there and parked about 4 miles away from the arena! Still excited...I turned off the car got our things from the front seat and got out. I walked over to get Lil but her door was locked. Hmm…that’s odd. No big deal. Reached in my pocket to get my keys – NO KEYS. Still calm, I walked over to my door with the hope it was still unlocked. No luck. Okay…we are okay. Not going to panic. I am a resourceful girl…I can handle this. Walked over and told lily to sit tight for a second. I then proceeded to search the back of every truck around us. No exaggeration I looked in at least 15 truck beds. 15 of the cleanest truck beds in the state of Oklahoma. Now I was at the fair, surrounded by red neck trucks…that were spotless. No tools…no baseball bats…not even a coke can. Wow. so I thought, I will use my shoe. Looked down, have on tennis shoes. Really? The one time I leave my house not wearing stilettos. Still calm. Until I looked at Lil, who was now sobbing uncontrollably. Panic hits. Call John and am stunned that he can’t zap my car open from Central High…kind of thought he was magic. Finally see a guy on a golf cart. Wave him down and ask him if he has a bat. No bat. But he called the on site tow truck. Great. Sort of. 15 minutes later the truck gets to us. The guy gets out and starts the process. Lily still screaming. He is working slowly…I am trying to be patient. He took a small break at which point I wrapped a sweatshirt around my hand and started pounding on the front window. Turns out…car glass does not break easily…just hurts your hand. His cell phone rings…HE ANSWERS IT. WHAT?? He begins a conversation to his buddy telling him, “I am trying to get a baby out of a locked car…sure I can give you directions….blah blah blah…” mind you all this time I am crying, sweating, trying to sing to lily…looking like a psycho talking to a tinted window. I lost it. I walked around the car and said a few choice explitives to the man and asked for his crow bar thing so I could break the window. I am positive I scared the doodle out of him. He got off the phone. Took him about 5 more minutes and she was out! She was sweating and blotchy from crying so hard…I looked the same. We hugged and hugged and then she asked me why I yelled at that man! Whew, she was seemingly unscared…can’t say the same for the tow truck guy….

Learned a lot from last night. I thought it over on the way home. Cried again. I know she was safe, but she was scared. For those of you who know Lily, you know she is tender hearted…very dainty…and not at all what one would call brave. It broke my heart that I could not get to her.

How many of you have been there? How many of you are there now? Watching someone you love struggle and you can do nothing. How many of you are the Lily in the situation. Desperate for help…but thinking that no one coming for you? Allow me, if you will to lend some comfort. For all of you trying to convince someone that you ARE there…look at Jesus. He is doing the same for you. For those of you stuck in a locked car…you are not alone. You have a Savior on His way to get you out. Hold steady. Take a deep breath. You have intercessors praying you through it. Though it may seem you are alone in your fight…remember if you can’t see Him, He may just be grabbing a big bat to bust you out. He is there…you will be free…there will come a moment when the locks are opened and you can run to the arms of you Father. You can hug Him and cry together. He will hold you all the way home!!

Love you all!! and thanks for not judging me too harshly on yelling at the tow guy…I did pray about that one!!

no hesitation

This morning Lily hopped up at 5:45! John and I were getting ready in our room. Lily was in the kitchen and said, “daddy I need to hold you.” He was right in the middle of getting his bag ready for school, but he did not hesitate…he dropped his stuff and went right to her to pick her up. This is not an unusual thing for John. If one of our girls wants his attention, he goes. He never asks them to wait. I am bad about saying, “give momma one second to finish this…” Not John. His daughters know that when they call on him, he is there…no question.

I love this about my husband. Love. he is amazing in just about every way a person can be, but to watch him be a dad is just incredible. He shows our girls such a beautiful picture of God’s love for them. It is just beautiful.

Two things came to mind this morning as I watched them play. The first was praising my Father because He comes to me the very moment I call on Him. If I am in need…He is there. I sometimes forget that about Him.

The second was – am I as quick to answer Him when He calls on me? Nope. I can answer that without a second thought. I am quick to say, “of course Lord, I will do that….when I get ready….when I have time….when I am done with….” I shudder to think of all the missed opportunities to share the love of Christ because I am too busy.

Today my prayer is one of praise and conviction. I am eternally thankful that God is so ever present. And I pray that I become more willing to be a without hesitation Christian.

Love you all so much

daddy God

The other night, we were all (john, lily, Claire and myself) playing in the girls’ room. Lily really wanted to move the stroller, but was having trouble. John tried to help, but she really wanted to do it herself. John said, “if you will let daddy, I will help you.” Hmmm….

This statement was said to my daughter, but I know God was saying, “ Meagan Beth, if you will let me, I will help you.” IF will let Him. This is a hard thing for me. I am a huge control freak. I will hold on to the very last second before I really let God in. But He is there waiting. Crying out to me to let Him take over. It is also hard for me to call on Him as Father. I was raised by a single mother and was not close to my dad until I was about 23. So, to call Him Abba Father, my daddy God, requires complete surrender on my part. If you are like me I pray this for your heart and mine.

Abba Father, my daddy God… you are big enough. You want the very best for my life and I ask right now that you help me let go of all the control I am holding on to. I ache for you to be Sovereign in my life. You are the controller of all Heaven and Earth -- - help me trust you to be the controller of my life. amen

no momma...HERE

Last night after I got Claire bear to bed, I was running around the house picking up and getting things ready for today. Lily ran up to me and said, “momma the moon woke up…did you see it?” I walked to the door and looked out. It was in deed a beautiful moon. I told lily this, but she was not satisfied. She said, “no mamma…here.” She took my hand and walked me outside. We walked over to our big rock and she instructed me to stand on it. Then she said, “See that moon momma.” She wanted me to really stop and look at the moon. She took me to the best viewing place she knew and shared her sweet sight with me.

When was the last time you really stopped? We are all so busy…too busy to stop and enjoy His majestic blessings. I mean, did you see the moon last night?! It was breathtaking. He used Lily to make me stop and see how blessed I am. In the few minutes that we stood looking at that spectacular sight, I even let the pain in my headache fade away. For a moment I was still in the presence of His grace. If you haven’t stopped today, I would encourage you to do so. If you don’t think you have time, you are in greater need of a moment than you may realize…

well...i really

This morning I was getting the girls ready for school. This is my favorite thing to do! Usually on Sundays, I iron a weeks worth of outfits for everyone. Then I let Lily pick her outfit out of the five as the day comes. This morning she was looking at her two remaining outfits and she said, “I want my Minnie Mouse shirt”. I said, “well, Minnie is in the dirty clothes so you can choose from these two that are already ironed and ready to go.” Granted, she has no idea what ironed means! But in watching her, I saw a picture of myself.

I ask God for blessings…He gives them. Then I say, “well, I really wanted ______” you fill in the blank. Sure Lord, you have provided me with this nice house and cars but why can’t I have the bigger house and the better car? I like my furniture, but I would really like new. His blessings are abundant in my life, but always want more…or different. Just like Lily didn’t see that I had carefully chosen her clothes for the week, made sure they were clean and ironed and laid them out for her – I don’t always see how perfectly designed my life is according to His riches in Christ Jesus. Today my prayer is that I will not only see the blessings, but that I will be content with them and praise Him for all I have. For all I have is much more than I deserve

big arms

Last night John and I fell asleep on the couch. He had his arm around me. When I woke up and realized that we had fallen asleep, I started to get up. As I did, his arm tightened around me. I love that…

This morning as I was praying about some things in my life, God showed me that John’s arm around me was just one example of how closely He is holding on to me. God has His huge arms around us all the time. My faith has been shaky lately - but every time I try to move away, God’s arm tightens. He is not about to let me go. And He is not about to let you go either. Forget the old saying, “keep holding on…” you don’t have to. He’s got you. He’s got you wrapped up in His huge love and He is not letting go. Rest in that today.

Love you all so much

the wrong medicine

So, today will mark day 7 of my new friend…the tension headache. It is unreal. I have never had to deal with headaches much so this is new territory for me. Last Thursday, the doctor called in a prescription for Imitrex, because we thought I was having a migraine. Turns out, if you take migraine medicine for a headache that is not a migraine it doesn’t help. In fact, it made it worse.

This weekend I thought about all the medicine I have tried to use to make this headache go away. In thinking about that, my thoughts turned to all that I try to do to fix things in my life and my heart. I have a system of “fixes” for about everything I go through. I work and work to make the hurt, fear or frustration go away. I search in every area I can to make it all go away. And you know what…nothing works and a lot of times I make it worse. Because I am taking the wrong meds. Why do I try to fulfill my life through worldly things when the Truth is right in front of my eyes waiting for me to grab on.

Ask yourself – what am I trying to fix my life with? If it is anything other than the Saving Grace of Jesus…you are taking the wrong stuff…

Love you all so much

let the love in

So, here I am working away listening to my ipod shuffle – Keelee put all new music on it so it is like a surprise every song! Love that! Well, I just heard a Rascal Flatts song and one of the lines said - - hold on as tight as they’ll let you - - I played the song over about three times. Something about that line really made me think about how God loves me. He loves me unconditionally without hesitation or reservation. He gave His one and only Son for me. But His love for me only penetrates as far as I allow it to. Being the gentleman that He is, He will not push His way into my life. We tend to compare our human love with God’s love for us. We get hurt by people and we put up walls. When we do that, we inadvertently put up walls that block out God’s love also. We “protect” ourselves from hurt, but really all we are doing is shielding ourselves from all the love there is to be received. And when we block love, we have less love to give. Today, look at your heart. Are you letting God love you and hold you as tight as He can?

stuck

Last night Lily was playing and she decided that she could fit between the couch and the table. Well, she almost fit – but of course she got stuck. She just looked at me at first like - - stink. I did this now I have to ask for help out - - She attempted to wiggle out on her own to no avail. Then she decided to play right there for a while! So silly! She got comfy (mind you she was not hurt!) playing there so she just stayed put. It took her a while, but when she did ask for help and I was right there to get her out.

The last few weeks I have been in a pit. It is a pit I got myself into and a pit that I have been all too comfortable living in. Anyone been there? It took me more than a little while to decide I needed help out. More than that, I decided that I needed help wanting out. I had become so comfortable in my darkness that I didn’t have a desire to leave. I asked a couple of prayer warriors in my life to intercede for me. The first day, I couldn’t feel the prayers…because I chose not to. When I finally decided to let down my walls and let the prayer in, the pit became less comfortable. I began to ache to be free. And by yesterday I was able to call on the Lord myself. I called to Him and He was there. He showed me the most beautiful picture as He lifted me out of my darkness. There along the way…my friends…my intercessors cheering me on. God heard their prayers on my behalf and used them to give me the desire to be free.

Where are you today? Are you too comfortable in a pit of your own? You don’t have to be transparent with me, but I urge you to be transparent with someone. Don’t let the cool darkness of your pit become your new home. If you don’t have the desire to pray your way out, ask someone to pray that you get the desire to be free. As comfortable as you may be in your pit…it is time to be free.

Isaiah 49:9I will say to the captives, 'Come out,' and to those in darkness, 'Be free!' "They will feed beside the roads and find pasture on every barren hill